The Zelda franchise has been a staple product by Nintendo
for decades with little changing from the core mechanics of the game. Swords
will be grabbed, things collected for power, hookshots to be acquired, water
dungeons to be feared, items to be traded for more and more items.
Take a look at any of the games and you'll see the same
pattern repeat with perhaps a little sub note "This time it's
sailing" or "This time it's flying" or "This time you're
also a wolf" and so on and so forth. Monsters will be killed, princesses
will be saved, Gannon (usually) gets his shit slapped back and forth (or his
shadow in this case).
But why do I look at this game? Why do I ignore the 2 NES
iterations for now and focus on the poorly viewable Gameboy edition? Because I
feel that this game is the most suited for its console. If you were to give me
a Gameboy and tell me that I had to have one game super-glued in there for the
rest of its existence. My mind will likely go to Zelda rather than Tetris, Pokémon
or similar themed games.
It all starts innocently enough with Link (Or dickshit if
you like to rename things) being ship wrecked and waking up on an island beach
where he is found by the local inhabitants, missing all of his items from his
previous adventure. Would be nice to just once, start a game with all the items
and weapons and KEEP them the whole time or upgrade them. Not throw in some convoluted
idea of having them taken/lost/broken etc.
So dickshit wakes up and hops out of bed, talking to the
nearest big-nosed citizen of the island hands back the shield he found with
"dickshit" written on the inside and assumes that was his name too.
Rather fortunate he wasn't a teacher with a series of heavily defaced school
desks, lest he though the name was "Dave fucked Becky 4 evar" and a
whole series of badly drawn, spunking cocks. Though perhaps that's just
difficult to write in ASCII these days... ~ c===3 Nope, there's no excuse.
Shield in hand, Dickshit then takes it upon himself to
get his stuff back together and get off the island while occasionally popping
in and out to help with various problems and situations that have arisen for
the island goers. Particularly that with his arrival, the monsters are getting
restless and someone needs to collect 8 items (8 bosses... why does 8 seem so predominant
in Zelda lore anyway?) to wake up the mystical Wind Fish that will grant a
wish, or some such bull, and let Dickshit escape the island. The bosses don't
want this, the island-goers want to help and various towns and villagers will
aid and support throughout.
But no Zelda game is complete without side missions and
quests. One long ongoing quest is the item trade, starting with a Yoshi doll
and trading all the way up through bananas, pineapples, sticks, dog meat,
necklaces, scales and finally a magnifying lens... "Good trade" of
which helps you read the magical answer to the final dungeon. Or just read a
guide. Alternatively, collecting 20 secret seashells and going into the secret
seashell hut will give you the Level 2 sword which gives you laser shooting abilities
at full health and generally causes more pain than the Level 1.
As you progress you'll find various dungeons, contained
within are monsters and beasties and the more fun hearts that boost your
health, an item that will help you get to the next dungeon and/or kill the
current dungeon's boss. Another steady consistency for the series, dungeon 1
contains a feather and is needed to get to the boss and jump over holes to get
to dungeon 2. Dungeon 2 contains a power bracelet that lets you pick stuff up
which you need to do to break the boss's container, and pick up items in the
way to dungeon 3. So the whole island can be explored and searched though only
when you've enough items to fulfil those criteria.
Yes there's another hookshot and yes there's a
water/swimming based dungeon though the real pig of a dungeon is the Eagle
Tower where you've got to think in 3 dimensions quite extensively with little
precursor for it.
During the game you'll find clues and hints to the nature
of the island, help save and rescue people that will aid you in your quest and
find all manner of rupees, items, shells and other such that will boost your
stats and strength in various guises. You'll quickly learn where the shop is
and how to get around the island quickly with regards to teleport spots and
mystical musical notes. Which plays a key theme of the game with 8 instruments
needing to be found to awaken the Wind Fish (in name only, for it is neither).
As it transpires the game is very much the big twist in
itself except for the "you're really asleep" twist it turns out
you're an unwilling participant in something else's dream and to escape the
island you'll need to wake that creature up, but the bosses and nightmares of
the dungeons don't want that to happen as it'll make everything disappear (and
they do mean everything). Leaving a little moral dilemma of wondering whether
you really should be waking up the sleeping dreamer if it means the end to all
the creatures, all the villagers, the semi-focused love interest, who are all
blissfully unaware of what may happen or what will happen should you succeed.
To escape you have to end them all.
Now, this draws up various metaphysical arguments, like
if you should care that something is about to fade out of existence that previously
just popped into existence? Who is dreaming the dream? Why do chickens attack
if you hit them repeatedly? ... Ok maybe not that one. Should you feel bad that
an island ceases to exist just to free you from the binds that hold you or
would it have been more noble to leave the inhabitants alive and living their
day to day lives while you co-habit their realm with them?
Those more in touch with their thoughtful sides of
nature, may have reservations about a game that forces you to destroy the
entire game-world upon completing it having already exterminated the evils
contained within. It's certainly not the thought provoking situation one would
expect from a game that has you riding down rapids rides, playing songs with
giant frogs, riding a flying rooster, or phoning an old guy for hints on where
to go but talking to him in person is something he's too shy to do.
It certainly takes the shine off the heroes' perfect
edge. The ending also makes you out to be a bastard too, given who you watch
fade out when the dreamer awakens. (Unless you beat the game without dying
once...)
Controls are very responsive to being used, navigating
yourself in the 8 main directions of the compass points, your A and B button
can be switched out for any combination of items you have, be it sword and
shield to hookshot and bombs, arrows, magic powder, shovel, fire rods etc.
Usually you'll have the sword and feather for navigation while using the power
bracelet really should have been a passive item for picking up and lobbing stuff
around. While moving and navigating dungeons and maps has you walking off the
edge of the screen to the next area, for some that might feel a little claustrophobic
from the SNES version having scrolling areas but given the Gameboy's graphic
limitations and blurring, it makes the best of the situation and does admirably
so.
Combat can be a little awkward at times if you're being
bounced into something that causes injury, draining more hearts and then being
knocked down a hole. Most holes will cause damage and respawn you at the point
where you entered the screen while some (usually indicated, not always) will
drop you into an area underneath though this is particularly notable for the
7th dungeon where you can fall down several floors to navigate around the
dungeon. Though be particularly careful in the 7th dungeon as there's a way to
trap a key item in a place you can't get to and bollocks up everything.
Though, with a game this fun, I don't mind playing
through several times. Though the 1st dungeon boss can rebound you down a hole,
forcing you to climb back and by the time you get there, he's back to full
health... Lovely. There are parts that grate.
It certainly grows upon you and the longer you play it
the more familiar you'll become with the game. Eventually you'll know exactly
where everything is in the map and know how and where and when to get from the
Animal Village, to the Raft Adventure, or back to the shop that now calls you
THIEF!!! for stealing the 980 rupee item and doing a runner. Incidentally,
EVERYONE will call you that afterwards and going back into the shop is an
instant death for returning to the scene of the crime. Varying degrees of
punishment and retribution on that one, everyone calling you thief and showing
an inherent distrust of you, to dying for returning to the shop (perhaps with
the intention of returning the item, but likely because you forgot you
five-fingered-discounted the bow and arrow set like a cheap bastard).
There are moments of annoyance however when the game
intentionally gives you a very useful item or colleague (Flying Rooster... Looking
at you...) which acts as the key to attaining the level 7 dungeon, only to have
it revoked by the end of the dungeon and ends up with some guy that looks after
chickens and won't give the Rooster back. A formerly dead Rooster that you
resurrected... What a git. Without it, you can't "hover" any more and
are limited to jumping with the feather and running shoes to a 3 hole gap
(maybe more if you're fortunate) and it feels like the potential to really
explore has been removed.
The pace and flow of the game is very balanced and the
game doesn't leave you at any point thinking it's too small or too large. The
island size is perfect for the means and modes of transportation than are
available and the dungeons evenly spread far enough to give you a suitably
sized sight-seeing tour of the surrounding neighbourhoods before getting down
and scrappy within the dungeons and duking it out with all manner of nasties
and bosses. Special mention going to the Stalfos Knight that you have to fight
several times before he does a runner.
An enjoyable romp from to start to finish brought down by
a few glitches and game-breakable errors that could be happened upon if you're
not careful. (Incidentally, DO take the powder with you to the final boss
fight...)
Now time to get my fire rod and burn that fox and all the
chickens I can find.
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